Saturday, July 16, 2016

Fears Of Being Pregnant and Being a Mother

For years since we got married in 2011, we've had people asking us to have a baby pronto while we were still "young". Only a few people (and friends) advised us to do what we wanted to do first before jumping into parenthood. You know, like travel the world, win the lottery, etc ... haha!

In all honesty, I was always terrified of going through pregnancy and motherhood. No, it wasn't about 'being pregnant' but going 'through pregnancy', if there's a difference. Which I think there is.

Or maybe not ... :D

My main fear was being an overweight pregnant woman and an overweight mother soon after the 9 months were over. I was terrified of putting on too much weight and never be able to shed it off. 

I thought I'd be able to lose some weight first before being pregnant but I don't think I tried hard enough! 

I didn't enjoy the weight gain during my first two trimesters because I was always hungry (1st trimester) and I didn't exercise enough during the second trimester. I was annoyed with myself, especially when my weight kept increasing and my appetite was not fading.

It was hard to stop worrying about the unnecessary or excess weight gain and focus on being healthy and fit. Somehow through time, I did adjust my focus. It made me feel better when friends commented that I looked OK for a pregnant woman.

Nevertheless, I would remind myself every now and then about how lucky and blessed I was:
1. My pregnancy was normal and there were no complications;
2. My weight gain was 14kg, which some might say was still too much and some will say that's not too bad. I made sure I walked more during my final trimester and did my best to eat well.
3. I don't have too much stretch marks, just a little bit below my abdomen.
4. I was able to sleep well through the night - you hear stories about babies in tummies kicking up a storm when mummies are sleeping at night.
5. My baby was (and still is) a healthy one.

Made these bibs in April. Haven't used them yet as they are quite big for him at the moment.

Moving on, now that the bub is out and 6-7 weeks old, let me tell you about what I feared about being a mother. One of the main reasons I felt that I wouldn't be ready for motherhood was being selfless. I could never imagine myself devoting 99% of my time and energy to a helpless child nor the patience it required. ('It' as in motherhood, not baby!)

I still can't imagine myself being unselfish but no doubt motherhood will slyly change me all for the sake of the bub. Hmmm ...

The first few weeks of postpartum were hard. I was irritated by the constant crying and my inability to decipher his cries. The lack of sleep didn't help either. Nor did it help that there were restrictions in my movements during confinement, e.g. I had to walk slowly and carefully so that I didn't tear my stitches. And he was just so fussy - he hated being changed out of his clothes and diapers, didn't enjoy his baths, took more than an hour to settle after feed to go back to sleep, and wanted to be carried often.

What I thought I'd get, was the ideal baby who could sleep through the night with less fuss after feeds, the independent one who could be put down to sleep without having to be rocked and held to sleep first.

Well, it's a hard knocked life and I had to be more realistic, Bin said.

Thursday, July 14, 2016

Making A Mess With Sewing

14 July 2016 
Gosh, this post has been in the draft folder for a few months now and I'm already a mother to a 6.5 week old baby boy! :D :D :D

Sooooo in February, I finally took out the sewing machine I bought last year. I finally had the guts to test it out and see if I'd enjoy sewing.

I had so much fun that I find myself hunting for things I could sew, without it being too complicated for a beginner like me.

The bigger elephant cushion will be handy for the bub's tummy time, I think.

I started with a small elephant pillow and was surprised how small it turned out. So I got the hubs to enlarge the pattern which he drew for me.

Made a pink striped version for my ex-colleague who's expecting a baby girl this month. 

I was so pleased to finish my crochet baby blanket and sew a pale yellow flannelette backing to it, which makes it feel *really* comfy, I didn't expect to be emotional whilst sewing the flannelette to it, but I started to think about my late paternal grandmother, who is the only person I know in the family who used to sew us pillows, pajamas and patchwork blankets. Despite my shoddy handiwork, I hope she's proud of me for picking up sewing as a hobby. :D

I made 2 kiddy tote bags for a friend's daughters and they were pretty excited and happy to receive them, despite my really poor handiwork. A shame I didn't have enough of that glittery striped fabric to complete both bags!

I had to use 2 - 3 different pieces of fabric to piece 1 bag together!

Lil Miss K posing with the bag.

I made another tote bag for a friend to use as I had this great idea that it would come in handy, especially when you're out and about with the kids. Of course, when it came to execution ... that was another story. :P

Once again, using Fat Quarter fabrics and trying to match the colours.

A different colour inside.

I was hoping I'd be able to make myself a nappy tote bag but decided not to stress myself and wait for some free time in between baby's naps but ... well, seems like that's going to be impossible until he starts napping for more than 30 minutes!

I can honestly say that sewing is fun, but a shame that the materials you need can cost a bomb!