I have been feeling rather lost since ... hmmm.
I can't put my finger to it.
Nothing feels right anymore. Not even the shoes I used to love, my running attire (I think that's because I still haven't lost my holiday weight and more) and the humid weather doesn't make things any better at all.
The pain in my legs are very annoying and frustrates me even more and somehow I no longer have the stamina to run well.
The constant battle with bad complexion and extra weight isn't helping with my self esteem, either.
Everything demotivates me.
I ran 1.5KM intervals on Tuesday and it was shites. I wanted to quit right then and there but the conscience said no freaking way and a, "Buck up, soldier!" ... which I found rather amusing.
If the husband was beside me, he would have given me a good talking down.
And possibly massage my legs, too.
It's very frustrating not to be able to describe this annoyance and frustration I have. I thought I could make things better with some retail therapy yesterday. A nice pink Mizuno dri-fit t-shirt and super hot Nike running skirt didn't do the trick, as what I wanted most was a new pair of running shoes to last me til the end of the year.
I just want to scream, to punch, to kick, to do something to get it off my chest and to rid the pain in my legs.
Forget the Standard Chartered KL Marathon on 30th June.
Forget the plan to run the half marathon in 2 hours.
In fact, forget about running at all.
I'm just going to lie here and be a couch potato again.
And get fatter.
And bake more muffins.
Throw my running shoes away.
Go to sleep.